Defying Gravity
A wakeup call from the woman in green
I saw Wicked.
Let me start by saying that I knew nothing about Wicked. I had never the musical or heard the songs. I had no idea what I was getting into. The most I knew was the “Popular” song that was trending on TikTok and that people cried while watching it. Please don’t judge too hard y'all! I was just out of the loop.
So, this is not a critique or evaluation of the movie but simply a piece on how I connected with it. Obviously, it was amazing, everyone ate, can't wait for part two!
But beyond that… I felt connected to underlying messages about oppressive systems, the power of propaganda, and relationships. I especially felt connected to Elphaba’s journey to self-acceptance and trusting her path.
Elphaba’s Journey
Elphaba, my girl!
I saw so much of myself in her. She stood strong and independent, not because it was in her nature, but out of necessity and survival. She tried to make others comfortable, often at the expense of her voice, space, and identity. She made so many sacrifices just for it not to work, and still be excluded, ridiculed, and exiled.
And the weight and impact of that… I completely understood. There’s a heaviness that comes with years of constantly adjusting, accommodating, and performing for others. You become so disconnected from yourself and your identity, constantly shrinking yourself. And after some time, you don't recognize yourself.
When Elphaba was finally accepted and valued, told that her magic was a gift rather than a curse — I felt her relief. Madam Morrible’s encouragement, Glinda’s friendship, and her journey to Oz all seemed like signs of acceptance. But as Elphaba discovered, it was all conditional.
Glinda, for example, (sorry, I don’t care that she came around at some point), her acceptance of Elphaba had strings attached. She liked Elphaba when she was useful or non-threatening. And when things got complicated – like when they learned the truth about the Wizard — Glinda dismissed her concerns. Watching Glinda tell Elphaba to "hear everyone out" wasn’t just frustrating; it was heartbreaking. It wasn’t about doing the right thing—it was about Glinda not wanting to stir the pot and securing her place in Emerald City. Even her doubts about Elphaba’s power during the broom scene felt like a betrayal, driven by her self-interest. She had something to gain from Elphaba’s cooperation and it was painful to watch.
That realization—the moment Elphaba understood that everyone’s acceptance came with strings attached—was devastating. I started bawling – like full-on tears (I tried to keep it together because I was with a friend but omggg). The disappointment and heartbreak of realizing that those moments she was “seen” and “valued” weren’t real. They were contingent on Elphaba giving people what they wanted. It’s one thing to know you don’t fit into someone else’s vision of you. It’s another to realize that even the people who claim to see you don’t fully accept you.
This shift in her journey builds to one of the most iconic and emotional moments in Wicked: “Defying Gravity.”
Defying Gravity
Elphaba’s heartbreak felt so familiar. It wasn’t just the disappointment of not fitting other people’s expectations—after all, that’s life. It was the realization that even the people who seemed to see and accept her didn’t. And at that point she’s alone.
But that’s what makes the "Defying Gravity" scene so powerful. It’s the moment when Elphaba stops chasing external validation. She lets go of the need for acceptance from those who can’t—or won’t—see her for who she truly is. We saw a glimpse of it when she tells the Wizard she still wants to be green, but it's during “Defying Gravity” where it all clicks.
Too late for second-guessing
Too late to go back to sleep
It's time to trust my instincts, close my eyes and leap
She decides to trust herself. To embrace her power and her identity, regardless of what others think. She decides to resist the status quo and release herself from the standards imposed on her. Watching her make that leap of faith reminded me of the importance of radical self-acceptance: valuing and believing in yourself even when the world refuses to.
Like Elphaba, I had been holding back, unsure if I could step fully into who I am. But seeing her defy expectations made me reflect on my journey and the fears I was ready to leave behind.
Trusting Your Purpose
Before I saw Wicked, I was sitting in therapy talking about how tired I was. Tired of constantly second-guessing myself. Tired of always seeking permission or validation from others because I was too scared to trust my instincts. I couldn’t lean into myself or my purpose because I didn’t think I was enough on my own.
But I don’t want it
No, I can’t want it anymore
Something has changed within me
Something is not the same
I’m through with playing by the rules of someone else’s game
It felt like Elphaba was reaching through the screen to speak directly to me. Those lines perfectly captured the exhaustion I’d been carrying—the weight of trying to meet everyone’s expectations while ignoring my voice. I realized, like her, that I didn’t want to play by those rules anymore.
For so long, I’d been holding myself back, afraid to take risks or step outside of what felt safe. But watching Elphaba claim her power and declare she was done playing small lit something in me. It was a reminder that trusting yourself is the most courageous and necessary act of all.
Wake Up Call
Seeing Wicked without any prior knowledge allowed me to experience it in its purest form, and in doing so, I connected with Elphaba’s journey in such a raw, personal way. Her story reminded me that we all go through moments where we feel unseen, misunderstood, or out of place. But at some point, we have to stop seeking acceptance from others and embrace who we are, flaws and all. Elphaba’s leap of faith wasn’t just about defying gravity; it was about trusting herself and her purpose, even when no one else could. That moment of radical self-acceptance signifies that the freedom to be yourself is worth every risk, every rejection, and every uncertain step forward and knowing. It’s a powerful reminder that true growth comes when we trust in who we are, even when no one else can see it yet.
Let me know your thoughts!
IG: @ioniesmuse
This inspired me to watch wicked!! I’ve seen many other people talk about how great it is both as a narrative and in terms of how it touched them (and yes, the songs are very catchy) but this is the first review i read that compells me to give it a watch, thank you for this!!